When I first learnt that every person has a unique purpose, I was so curious to find mine. Later, when I learnt that purpose is what brings joy, fulfillment and meaning to one’s life, I was restless and impatient to seek the purpose of my life. I started asking questions about purpose to all my psychologists, therapists and spiritual teachers; and surprisingly I received the same response from all of them “You don’t have to find your purpose, your purpose will find you”. Although I didn’t quite grab the purpose-will-find-you concept at that time, I got a clear message from the calmness and trust in their voices that restlessness and impatience don’t pave the way to finding my purpose.
So, I let that restlessness and impatience go, and surrendered my desire for a purposeful life to the care of the Universe. Five years down the lane, I got a taste of what my purpose is, and I can assure you it is a blissful, effortless state of being.
Well, my therapists were right when they said, “You don’t have to find your purpose, your purpose will find you”. Now I would like to add to it “To allow your purpose to find you, you need to live life connected to your true self. When you live a life aligned with who you are, the innate spark which always existed WITHIN YOU will show itself. Your purpose has always been a part of you. All of us were in touch with our spark (our purpose) in our childhood, and as children we served others with our purpose. Children don’t need a reward to serve, they serve just because it makes them smile seeing smiles in other faces. However, as we grow older, we learn to look for accomplishments and successes outside of us. The more we looked for success and meaning outside, the more we deviated from our true spark. The spark that gives us light and motivates us to bring light to others’ lives. We all have a spark that the world needs. I’ve asked many beautiful spiritual teachers whether WE ALL HAVE A SPARK TO SHARE WITH THE WORLD, and they all said it was one of the eternal truths of life. So, be assured that you’ve a purpose too.
I am elated to share my journey from knowing nothing about purpose to getting a taste of what my purpose feels like. I trust that my journey brings some assurance, hope and positivity in your life, and gives you some insights into effortlessly and gracefully allowing your purpose to find you.
As a schoolgirl, I enjoyed meeting little kids during lunch breaks. When I was in primary school, I accompanied most of my friends who went to check on their younger siblings during breaks, and later in high school I went by myself to primary classes and made friends with little ones. I had totally forgotten about my enthusiasm to interact with kids until my best friend from school reminded me a few years ago.
Since college, I became so disconnected with my true self in all aspects whether it was related to studies or relationships. I started chasing wrong people and wrong circumstances which in turn led me to the rock bottom of my life, and that rock bottom in return led to me questioning what life is about.
In case you wonder why I chased wrong people and wrong circumstances; it was because I was so devoid of love & validation that I found any tiny bit of love & validation worth chasing. I never felt accepted by people, yet I couldn’t let go of that tiny bit of love & validation. Now when I introspect, the love that I thought was true was actually fake and delusional, and the situations that I thought were meaningful had actually taken me far away from my true self (and my purpose).
When life hit rock bottom, I felt a disconnection. I didn’t know what that disconnected feeling meant at that time. Astoundingly, this same disconnected feeling said to me one day “Find your connection”, and that set me out to find my connection- connection with myself, connection with the world around, and connection with my purpose. I started looking for true love, true purpose, true meaning. Thanks to my life experiences which taught me what the flip side of true love, true purpose and true meaning is. I think it makes it easier to find what you want when you know what you don’t need.
Soon that day came. The day that reminded me of my spark. The day when a 22-year-old young man rang me, and lovingly asked me “Don’t you remember me, chechi (elder sister)? You used to come to my class and talk with me during lunch breaks while I was in first grade and you were in 12 th grade”. He said he found my phone number from one of my schoolteachers as he wanted to reconnect with me. During our conversation, he reminded me about that younger ME that I had forgotten (the younger- schoolgirl ME). The love that I experienced from the young gentleman during that phone conversation assured me that I did something so perfectly right on my visits to meet little ones during breaks at school. He kept telling me how much he adored me back then, and how much he loved connecting with me while I engaged with him during lunch breaks. After our conversation, I felt a fascinating sensation in my body which I haven’t experienced in a very long time. Thanks to my little -first -grader boy for giving me a glimpse of that spark within me which I totally forgot about. Now my little-first grader boy is a young man whom I can always reach out to when I need someone to make me feel loved and supported. After that conversation, I didn’t think much about it, although I often thought about that SPARK and cherished it. Honestly, at that time I didn’t think that SPARK had some association with my purpose.
After a few months, I noticed a little baby whom I met on my morning walk smiling at me. I smiled at the baby back and was overjoyed to see it looking at me with a much bigger smile. That was the second time I felt that SPARK. Then I decided to lean into that SPARK because it gave me an experience beyond words (probably I can call it bliss). I started having conversations with kids particularly on my morning walks around the neighborhood. Eventually I became friends with kids, and babies. Yes, often babies give me a friendly smile as if we are friends. The thing is I found a sense of bliss and spark in these experiences with kids.
When I noticed that again and again, I once shared with my psychologist that I love interacting with kids. He said “Wow, that’s a wonderful thing. I can’t start a conversation with kids, that’s the reason I don’t help children with their issues. I know many of my fellow therapists who can’t work with children. I am glad you can effortlessly interact with children. I think you will make a wonderful child therapist”. His words made me cry. It was fulfilling to know that I could make a career doing what I love. But I think the reason I cried was because I felt it was a connection with my purpose and my childhood experiences. As a child I never felt seen and valued, so it was profound to understand that there was something WITHIN ME that I could tap into to make many, many, many children seen, heard, valued and appreciated (I couldn’t stop typing the word many. That’s what I desire. I want to make infinitely many children seen, heard, valued and appreciated)
When this conversation with my psychologist happened, I was already half-way towards becoming a Certified Hypnotherapist and a Certified Rapid Transformational therapist. Rapid Transformation therapy (RTT) formulated by world-renowned Hypnotherapist, Marisa Peer, has a reputation of huge success working with children in overcoming their fears, phobias, improving their self-esteem and motivation; and helping with anxiety. So, that conversation assured me that my purpose is moving towards me.
There was an urge in me to interact with children and get to know their world. My heart constantly desires to be around children. So, I thought why not do some YouTube videos with kids. Last year, I did around seven videos interviewing kids below 10 years old. I really enjoyed it, and I felt a sense of fulfillment and connection interacting with kids and getting to know their world. I ‘ve realized that there is bountiful joy that flows within me when I talk about child, their behavior, and their uniqueness
Now that I graduated as a Hypnotherapist and a Rapid Transformational Therapy (RTT) practitioner, I am looking to broaden my purpose with children; and support many children realize their wholeness, value and uniqueness. If I were to tell one thing to parents, it would be “Your child is unique and invaluable. See your child’s uniqueness. When you see your child’s uniqueness, you will know that their uniqueness is unique, and will invariably cherish it and protect it at any cost. Eventually your child will share its uniqueness with the world and bring more authenticity and purpose in this world”.
I think the world desperately needs more authentic and real people. I am sick of fake people. I am sure you are too.
So, it is true that “You don’t have to find your purpose; your purpose will find you”. I think your purpose will find you when you are connected and aligned with your true self.
What does it mean to be connected and aligned with your true self? Many years ago, when I asked this question to a beautiful spiritual teacher in Bali, she said ‘Ask yourself every moment, what do I need to do to feel a little better? And do that’. It might be taking a long deep breath, going for a walk, making yourself a cup of tea, or having a nap. Our heart desires for little things. It is our unconscious social, cultural and family conditioning that makes us believe that in order to feel joyous we must do big things. I truly believe that it is the little joyous things that we do in every moment which adds up to create magic and true success in our lives.
So, create magic in the tiny moments of your life, and allow the bigger things to flow towards you.
Thanks for reading my story, beautiful people. Whichever stage of life you are at, I want to assure you that I see you in all your wholeness. I am with you. There are many people who share their own emotions. You are not alone. So, walk your path knowing you are on the right path because life is always right and wise. LIFE IS ALWAYS WORKING FOR YOU!
Enjoy my videos with kids https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5VyXcxmoUh8
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Lots of love and hugs
Devika, Certified Hypnotherapist and a Certified Rapid Transformational therapy (RTT) practitioner, Melbourne 😊