Dr. Lalitha Mathew

Dr. Lalitha Mathew needs no introduction. All of us here at ‘Prayaana’ know her as our Chief Mentor and as a sprightly lady who, knowingly or unknowingly, motivates whoever comes within her orbit. When we were looking for an apt personality for the Leading Lady of the Month column of our magazine, the first name that flashed in our inner minds simultaneously was that of our Dr. Lalitha Mathew.

‘AKSHARI’-THE HOUSE OF KNOWLEDGE IS AN ENGLISH/SOFT SKILLS/PERSONALITY ENHANCEMENT CENTRE HOUSED AT HER SPRAWLING VILLA IN MUTTOM NEAR ALUVA, KERALA.

What makes her stand out is her attitude towards life and her vibrant personality that makes her take up all the challenges that life presents, with her decisive chin held up & never sweeping the floor. Apart from a Ph.D. in English which she acquired after a bachelor’s degree in Education, postgraduation & a Master of Philosophy (M.Phil) all in English Language & Literature, she has to her credit, ever so many certificates given to her by national & international bodies for the special proficiencies she has mastered, esp. in the realms of Phonetics, Linguistics, the Spoken Word, Art & Art reviews, Theatre Arts from The School of Drama & other Performing Arts like Bharat naatyam, Carnatic Vocal & Veena, of course, her most popularly known talent-writing.

THE MOST IMPORTANT THING ABOUT HAVING GOALS IS HAVING ONE DR. LALITHA MATHEW.

Lalitha Ma’am is also a professor at CUSAT from The Centre for English and Foreign Language Studies. ‘AKSHARI’-The House of Knowledge is an English/Soft Skills/Personality enhancement Centre housed at her sprawling villa in Muttom near Aluva, Kerala.

HERE IS A SNIPPET OF THE ENJOYABLE AND EDUCATIVE INTERVIEW WE HAD WITH HER

Madam, can you give us an overview of your younger years and college days?

Dr.Lalitha: Basically I am from Trivandrum; my family lineage is to be traced back to a small village called ‘Thaandavan Thottam” in Thanjavur, Tamil Nadu from where during Tippu Sultan’s invasion, my great grandfather with his joint family brood left his agrahaaram & was fleeing in desperation to some land where his Shiva & pooja accessories would be safe. So embedded was he in the Saivite ethos. He found that Moncombu, in our beautiful Kuttanaad, was congenial to his agricultural inclinations. The family spread far & wide to different parts of Central & Southern Tranancore. My father having settled as a lawyer & businessman in the capital city, gave us our education there. After schooling at Holy Angels’ Convent, I studied BSc Mathematics in H.H. The Maharajah’s College for Women. But, God had proposed something unexpected & before becoming a Maths graduate, I chose my Life Partner at the tender age of 18 & found myself to be Mrs. Mathew!

You say that you studied Math but how come you are an exponent of English now?

Dr. Lalitha: That is a good question. After ten years of vegetating as the wife of a Civil Engineer in FACT Ltd; Kochi and being a wonderful homemaker for my husband & two lovely children, I found the hands of Providence beckoning me to enter the wide portals of Learning. With two children and a family to look after, it was not a simple job. But here again, I finished my B.A in English Language & Literature, bagging the 1st rank from Kerala University. From then on, there was no looking back.

What were the other achievements at your academic level?

Dr.Lalitha: I completed my B. Ed, MA, and MPhil, and got my doctoral degree from Calicut University. All these were done with a lot of compromises on the home front.

What were the main challenges that you had to address? As you both were from different backgrounds, how did you manage a successful marriage?

Dr.Lalitha: Love, love, and nothing but love was the only medicine that I had for this. My husband, like many others of his kind with a legacy to fall back upon, was rather keen on alcohol. Quoting Sri. John Abraham’s movie Agrahaarathilae Kazhutha’, used to tease me for not being a modern woman of the world regarding parties, drinks, etc., though he must have been secretly proud of my simplicity. But the factor ‘love’ made us stay together and sail across.

I have been told about the great tragedy in your life. Would it be too painful to talk about it?

Dr. Lalitha: Painful? No. Nostalgia even if it were a loss? Yes. My son Ananth, a fantastic human being, loving and lovable, left us in a jiffy when he was 27, well-employed, and getting ready for marriage. But I do not miss him much because I do not think that he is really gone. He is in my conscious, unconscious, and subconscious selves perennially and we have our intra-communication. I don’t dissect or analyze the veracity of my thoughts and maybe assumptions or illusions. When assailed with fear, anxiety, and insecurity, I reach out to him in my thoughts and he in his habitual suave self, helps me to take the right decision.

Still, I can find that you have never given up the YOU in you. While I speak to you I can feel the spirit of Life in you. How do you maintain this?

Dr.Lalitha(laughs): It maintains itself! I am very selfish about my grief in the sense that I share it uninhibitedly, only with my God. But I am extremely selfless about my joy, which I share with not only relatives and friends but even with acquaintances. ‘AKSHARI’ my brainchild, keeps me always motivated and in high spirits. I train people from age 15 to age 55 now. ‘ AKSHARI’ and its full form are self-explanatory. It is a house of Knowledge where people of all ages and statuses come to me to learn whatever Life Skills they lack. I provide not only English language skills but soft skills, etiquette, grooming, and the way to create a sense of well-being; that finesse & refinement which individually or in totality makes my pupil not only smarter, more articulate, and confident, but also turn life or living style into an art, within one’s budget, within the confining strictness of home and workplace environments, and fighting and winning over the fear monster in him. I have a fisher woman’s son, an auto rickshaw man’s daughter, a butcher’s wife & so on as my clientele. Millionaire businessmen too come to make themselves fluent English speakers. A small-time shopkeeper, a dyslexic adolescent, and a tortured daughter-in – law coming just to air her grievance are all a strong presence in my institution. This sense of power to educate, power to comfort, give to and get from an interesting cross-section of the society of which I am a part, a lot of love & compassion, is therapeutic, to put it mildly.

But what is the ultimate aim of this holistic education?

Dr.Lalitha: If people say about someone ‘’he lived till 30, but was buried at 80’’, it means that he had a full & productive life till 30; it was all over and he continued a dreary and dull life, of no use to himself or to his community, till his clinical death & subsequent burial at 80. So, one should not just ‘exist’ only because he was born, but should live, really LIVE, every moment of his life, whatever his life span may be. Another element within me that keeps me up always is the motto of selfless service. I am more into philanthropic activities and I firmly believe what we give to the world is what we get back& ultimately, good or bad, one gets only what one deserves.

What about your daughter and son-in-law?

Dr.Lalitha: My daughter Dr. Anjana Pradeep is a Homeopath. She is deeply spiritual and more philanthropic than I am & has a code of ethics very different from that of a professional & commercial medico. My son–in–law is the founder of FINMARK (financial market education). By God’s Grace, they are doing well & so are their daughters, Praarthana & Pratheeksha, who fight over only one thing-Priority for my affection & attention!

What is your take on a woman?

Dr.Lalitha: A woman is already empowered, because she is The Power. I have said so in most of my interviews in the visual media. Age cannot wither her, nor custom stale her infinite variety.