Dismissive and disrespectful husband

Q. My husband talks in a very dismissive and disrespectful tone with me, especially in public. What could be the reason and how do I handle the situation? I have been married for 11 years. I am not a very bold person, so don’t ask me to confront him or shout back at him. – Anonymous

A. Dear Reader,

Thank you for submitting your question to us. We completely understand your desire for anonymity, and we respect your privacy. Let me try addressing your concern.

It is important to start by acknowledging that being spoken to in a dismissive and disrespectful tone is not okay, regardless of the reason behind it. It is also important to recognize that it’s not your fault and you don’t deserve to be treated this way.

That being said, it can be helpful to try and understand why your husband may be speaking to you in this way. Perhaps he’s feeling stressed or overwhelmed about something and taking it out on you. Or maybe there are underlying issues in your relationship that need to be addressed. Regardless of the reason, it is important to communicate openly and honestly with your partner about how their tone of voice is making you feel.

If you are not comfortable with confronting your husband directly, consider seeking support from a therapist or a close friend. They may be able to help you find ways to communicate your feelings to your husband in a constructive way.

Additionally, it can be helpful to set boundaries around what you won’t tolerate in terms of how you are spoken to. If your husband continues to speak with you disrespectfully, it may be necessary to seek professional help r, in extreme cases, consider ending the relationship.

Above all, remember that you deserve to be spoken to with kindness and respect. Don’t settle for less.

Dr. Parul Goyal is a passionate educator and counselor and works dedicatedly to empowering women.