Ida Tin’s “Dear Men” Series: Part 18 of 29 – Feeding a Baby

Dear Men, this is post 18/29 on what it feels like to live in a woman’s body: Feeding a baby

It’s tempting to start with the marvels of breastfeeding, breast milk, of breasts really. But I will just let that be a given, and instead talk about what it feels like to feed a baby.

I breastfed both my kids for about a year, and it was easy. So, I was very lucky, for some it’s so hard, on both nipples and mind with cracked and bleeding nipples, too little milk or the baby wont suck right. But when I say easy, maybe you get the wrong idea. Yeah, the milk got into the babies and yet it was pretty demanding getting it there. In my life, it was a no-brainer to sleep in the same bed at the baby, and to breastfeed lying down. This might seem like details, but it was a world apart from having to get out of bed at night or having to be awake enough to sit up even. This allowed me to fall asleep with the baby. Both in the night and very often during the day too.

A cry from my baby would give this distinct prickling sensation in the nipples and the milk would start flowing, or actually, in my case, spray out. I cannot tell you how often I had big wet spots on my clothes. Then I would have an acute thirst: I would call who ever was around, please get me some water (or I will instantly die of thirst!)!

Breastfeeding does leave the dad out of the feeding process (except for getting water), and it tethers the mum to the baby. Those are two big things.

I travelled quite a lot and I had a baby sling where I could breastfeed the baby while it was in it. That made many tricky situations like queuing in an airport so much easier. Because a nipple is not only to feed a baby, it is also to calm a baby and stretch its patience.

For me breastfeeding was painful at times, with breast infections that made my breasts hard like a football, a cramping neck, I even had (temporary) nerve damage in my arms from lying down breastfeeding. At the same time, all those deeply intimate and connected moments with the baby were so precious, sometimes so deeply peaceful and always abundant with love. It was emotionally tough to wane the kids. But once I was on the other side, my breasts were for my own pleasure again, which had been a bit lost while breastfeeding.

There could be a whole separate post in this series about pumping, bottles, donating milk for premature born babies, baby formulas and workplace policies around pumping and breastfeeding.

>I welcome all experiences, shared in the comments.

I have only limited experience with that, but enough to make me appreciate how simple it is to just pull out a breast and not having to clean bottles, pump and maybe be away from your child more than you want to. Others find bottles easy and freeing. If mothers are well-informed and the world supports them, then I am sure each mother knows best what is right for her and her baby.

Artwork by Kyle Leuck

-This post by Ida Tin is shared on LinkedIn and is republished here with her permission. The SheSight Team has not made any changes to the content.