Ida Tin’s “Dear Men” Series: Part 2 of 29 – Early Sexual Awakening

Dear Men this is post 2 out of 29 for you. A series to share what it feels like to have a female body.

The first sexual awakening (feeling desire, fear, expectations, fantasies, shame or openness)


Boys (or girls or both) are probably always interesting, even in kindergarten, but then they start being attractive in a different way at some point, even before the body visibly starts changing. I am sure girls sexual awakening is as individual as anything else. I see some of my daughters friends have a naughty joy of showing off their butts in a avalanche of giggles. Others are more introverted.

I grew up in a culture where we had good sex education several times over the years and we played “boys catch the girls” (and the other way around) and if you got caught you’d get a kiss on the cheek. There were no ideas of “no sex before marriage”. It was entirely expected and normal that young people would fall in love, have sex – or perhaps, just have sex because it was fun and exciting.

The journey from having a “boyfriend” in the early school years which just mean agreeing to be it without doing anything sexual at all, to having sex the first time is often a many year journey. Lots of cuddles and kisses without going all the way.

Dreaming and desiring people that were impossible to get might also be a big thing.

Many other cultures is the exact opposite where girls are expected and guarded to be kept in the unknown about sex.

One of the things I think all girls have to learn is to deflect unwanted attention from boys and men. Figuring out how to be in communication but managing where things are going. Setting boundaries without making people angry is a scary and fine line.

-This post by Ida Tin is shared on LinkedIn and is republished here with her permission. The SheSight Team has not made any changes to the content.