Impressions Vs Reality

Many times we see FB posts or Insta pics and think how fabulous the lives of some people are! And we think, “Look at us, our lives are so mundane.”

Well, I have been there too.

Recently I was talking to an acquaintance and she told me, “See how you have become, so strong, so expressive, so bold. You look so happy in the pics you share. And look at me, I am having this boring mundane existence and now my children have left home and it feels like it is no longer worth living, I have no job, and my husband doesn’t have any time for me any longer and we are just existing.”

I felt bad for her and gave her some ideas to keep herself occupied but she said, “I don’t feel like doing anything and what is the point?”

Many people who see my Facebook posts think, look at her, she had a divorce, then married again, has a good career, runs a business, and appears happy and serene in the pictures. She is a strong woman.

Is this reality?

No!

🧑‍🌾Impression: She took the bold step to have a divorce.

👩🏿‍⚖️Reality: It took many years of excruciating introspection, motivation from my parents, and a good financial backup to ultimately take the plunge. 

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨Impression: She got married again in her forties. So she must be really bold.

👵🏼Reality: I could not trust a single person. I certainly didn’t have any love in my heart. I was friends for a long time with Jay before I summoned up enough courage to marry him. I am still skeptical. Seriously! 

😎Impression: She has a successful career.

😕Reality: I love being a pediatrician. But there are so many other things about a job which are at times difficult to handle. Many times I had contemplated shifting careers but in the end, I realized that I needed to practice. The joy of being a pediatrician is a major driving force for me even though there are times I can hardly refrain from screaming. 

👩🏻‍💼Impression: She runs a business. 

😒Reality: I love doing the production part but apart from that there are 100 other mundane jobs and responsibilities that literally make me 😰😰😰.There are ups and downs in any business and despite these, we have to keep at it. 

💃🏽Impression: She has overcome her hurdles.

👩🏻‍🦼Reality: My demons never leave. They are always hiding, waiting to pounce. Looking for that chink in the armor. But, I never hesitate to seek help.

Despite all this, I have a lot to be grateful for. My family, my job, my business, my friends, my team, my hobbies etc

So, anyone who looks at other people’s Facebook posts and thinks they have a fab life is very much mistaken.

  • Nandini Rejitha