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Everyone will start asking you when you’re getting married as soon as you graduate from college. Marriage has become not only just a business but also a competition. Everybody is rushing to get married as the tradition compels you to do. You need to hurry before all the nice ones are gone.

Especially girls, the older you are, the less market value you will have. Men can always get younger, more younger wives with better qualifications. But for girls, once all the good older men are out of the league, you must settle for a less appealing one. And for a woman, a younger husband is such a scandalous and outrageous thought.

But why though? Why this hurry to get married. Marriage should not be based on the right age or availability of a good ‘Rishta’. There is nothing wrong with wanting a partner in your life, but the relationship must be built in trust and love after both the individuals involved have become emotionally mature enough to handle the responsibilities of marriage. But since forever, in

Indian society, marriage has been something that you ‘obviously’ do after settling down in a job.

Usually, many women are married off at a much younger age than men. When the average marriage age for a man would be 30, for a woman it would still be 25. Although many free women nowadays opt to stay single till they find the right guy, not everybody gets this freedom. And an early marriage means less time to enjoy your single life, and no time to hang out with your girlfriends, to go on trips with them,  etc. In short, your time of enjoyment is considerably reduced.

There is a study that shows that unmarried, childless women are much happier than men or married women with children. Yet there is a common misconception that single people would be unhappy and are in desperate need of a partner. If you see a single woman in her mid-30s what you have for her is only sympathy. It does not matter if she is successful in her career and is leading a happy and free life. Society sees the purpose of women only to be getting married and giving birth. If she has not done that, then her life is considered a failure. This attitude needs to change.

Usually, single women are much more content with their lives than single men. So maybe if you are an Indian man, you should consider getting married. Supposedly, marriage makes more positive changes in a man’s life. He gets more responsible, starts earning more for the family and gets all the usual benefits that an Indian wife brings to your life.

However, if you are a female and are perfectly happy in your single life, think again before submitting yourself into a marriage. We still live in a world where gender disparity is a relevant thing inside marriage and although the world is slowly seeing a positive change, the responsibilities of childcare and household chores are distributed more to the female in the partnership than the male. As males enjoy the privileges that come with their gender, females are more burdened and grow less happy.

So, the times should come where marriage need not be a compulsory event in anyone’s life. Again, there is no harm in wanting a man in your life, but it should come only when you really want it, genuinely. Marriages should not be to show anyone else or win in the marriage race.

-Po r    K is      n