Overconfidence – Does it even exist?

Overconfident, the word needs an evacuation from the parenting dictionary.

Ms Jaseena Backer, a psychologist wrote on Facebook : 

“I don’t tell you about you, but I tell others about you,” is an Indian parenting philosophy that is in practice where parents reserve appreciation for their children directly for fear of children becoming overconfident. Children thus grow up lacking confidence and needing validation.

Overconfident, the word needs an evacuation from the parenting dictionary. As a psychologist, I work with adult children who have been torn from their self-worth which is mostly traceable to childhood traumas. Such adults don’t know how to respond to compliments when they grow up. “oh, it’s nothing,” we get to hear when we compliment others. They aren’t used to compliments so they don’t know how to grace one.  It also has a counter effect on the person complimenting, of having judged the receiver wrong.

Fear of raising overconfident children does not curb the words of appreciation that they deserve to hear. Words of acknowledgement and recognition will give them visibility in their own eyes and we can see confident adults in our eyes.

-Jaseena Backer