She Evolves

Looking back at history, we see our grandmothers and generations before them confined to the roles of the kitchen and the bedroom. Their voices were suppressed, their smiles restrained, and their clothing dictated by societal norms. Even during their menstrual cycles, they were secluded in isolated rooms, often unsafe or even distant from their homes. In times of need, they were moved away from their families.

As we reflect on our parents’ era, we observe a shift. While they had more freedom in their choices of attire and appearance, many still wore masks, allowing their husbands to dictate their decisions. Their preferences in dress, cuisine, and daily activities were often molded by their spouses.

However, in our modern society, the landscape is changing. Many women are seeking financial independence, pursuing their passions, and courageously stepping away from relationships devoid of respect and love, even in the face of violence.

Yet, amidst this progress, from my personal experience, I have encountered the story of a maiden trapped in a tumultuous relationship. Despite enduring hardships inflicted by her in-laws and spouse, she remains bound by societal expectations, hoping for a better future for her daughter. Her strength is evident as she supports her daughter through a divorce, not of her making, but she herself remains ensnared in her own struggles, sacrificing her worth for the sake of her child’s future marriage.

“This raises a poignant question for our society: What should she do in her predicament? It’s a question that resonates with women worldwide. Aren’t men equally responsible for upholding family dignity, or is it solely the burden of women to endure and sacrifice? Should they also provide love and care to the women who sacrifice so much for their families?”

In the journey of women’s lives, suffering often takes many forms. At a Prayaana expo, I encountered a young woman from a privileged background seeking not just a job, but liberation from the confines of her own family. Despite her education and upbringing, she found herself overshadowed by gender bias, witnessing her brother receive preferential treatment in every aspect, even in education choices.

Her parents, mirroring societal expectations, urged her to follow the traditional path of marriage and domesticity, just as her mother had done by marrying a well-settled man. Yet, beneath her mother’s facade of contentment lay the stifled dreams of a woman who had forsaken her own passions for societal conformity.

Caught in this cycle, the young woman yearned for autonomy, to chart her own path and pursue her own passions. Despite support from well-meaning relatives, she remained ensnared by the chains of familial expectation, bound by the illusion of love.

Should this be the fate we assign our daughters? Should we not empower them to soar freely, to discern between appearances and realities? Let us impart the age-old wisdom, ‘All that glitters is not gold,’ guiding them to navigate the complexities of life with discernment and resilience. Let our daughters not merely exist, but let them Fly High, in a world where their wings are not clipped by societal norms, but strengthened by their own independence and self-awareness.

-Rehna Haridas, a Prayaana member, and developer at Prayaana Jobs, is a nature enthusiast, and dancer, who enjoys music, writing, and IT programming.