To Every Daughter: Speak Up and Be Unapologetically You

Elsa and Me

As we celebrate the International Day of the Girl Child on October 11th, I can’t help but reflect on what I truly want for my daughter’s future. And really, for all the daughters out there. Are we doing enough to help them find their voices? Are we teaching them to be bold, to speak up, and to believe in themselves, no matter what?

When my daughter was born, I had one wish for her: happiness. It sounds so simple. But for me, that wish carried layers of meaning. I wanted her to grow up feeling joyful and fulfilled, to live a life that was true to who she was.

As I watch her grow, I’ve realized that one of the most important things I can teach her is to never be afraid to say what she feels or ask questions. But I also know this is easier said than done, especially when I think about my own childhood.

Growing up in India in the early ’80s, there were these unspoken rules about how girls should behave. We were raised with a long list of “don’ts.” Don’t be loud. Don’t question authority. Don’t step out of line. Boys were given more freedom to speak their minds, while girls were often expected to just follow along quietly.

I was the quiet child in school. I always listened, but I was too scared to raise my hand, even when I had something to say. I often felt like my voice didn’t matter. But deep down, I wanted to be brave enough to speak up.

As I got older, things started to change. I slowly found my voice, and it felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders. Being able to express myself gave me confidence and made me feel stronger. Looking back, I see that gaining that confidence was one of the most important journeys of my life.

Now, as a mother, I want my daughter to believe in herself much earlier than I did, without ever hesitating to share her thoughts and opinions. I want her to have the qualities I’ve worked hard to develop: confidence, happiness, ambition, and independence. More than anything, I want her to truly enjoy whatever path she chooses in life, without feeling the need to sacrifice her true self or hide who she is just to please others. That’s a heavy burden, and one I carried for far too long.

For me, this means creating a space at home where my daughter feels safe to be herself. I let her speak her mind, even when she disagrees with me. When she’s curious, I encourage her to ask questions, reminding her that it’s okay to be unsure. I don’t want her to ever feel like her thoughts aren’t important.

It’s also important that she knows it’s okay to feel all of her emotions—whether she’s happy, angry, or sad. Too often, girls are taught to hide their feelings or “be nice” all the time. I want her to know that her emotions are valid and she should never feel ashamed of how she feels.

But this isn’t just about my daughter. It’s about all the girls out there. It’s our responsibility, as parents, teachers, mentors, and friends, to make sure the girls in our lives know that their voice matters. We have to create environments—at home, in school, and in the community—where girls feel empowered to be themselves.

On this International Day of the Girl Child, let’s remember that supporting girls starts with encouraging them to express themselves with confidence. The world needs their ideas, their energy, and their dreams. It’s time to make sure they know that.

To my daughter, and to all the daughters out there: Don’t be afraid to take up space, to make your voice heard, and to be unapologetically yourself. The world is waiting for you to make your mark – go out there and shine.

-Neethu Paul is a passionate content writer with a love for traveling and exploring new experiences along the way.