Balancing career and motherhood

The beautiful journey of motherhood is a mix of joy and some pretty tough choices. At some point, many women find themselves at a crossroads, wondering, “Should I keep climbing the career ladder, or should I hit pause to nurture my growing family?” Well, the decision isn’t one-size-fits-all, and it’s deeply personal for every woman.

The “Comeback to Career” Program of Prayaana Labs, a brainchild of Dr. Chandra Vadhana, has been a guiding light for women who’ve faced this very dilemma. After interacting with numerous women who have braved the challenges of returning to work, Dr. Chandra has some valuable insights to share. Let’s dive into them one by one.

Lack of Domestic Help: One of the primary reasons women consider leaving their careers is the absence of domestic help. The daily juggle between work and household responsibilities can be physically exhausting and mentally draining.

Caregiving for In-Laws/Parents: Societal expectations of a “caring daughter or daughter-in-law” and limited healthcare facilities can place the burden of caring for sick in-laws or parents on a woman’s shoulders. The double duty can make pursuing a career challenging. Dr. Chandra remembers a lady telling her that her mother-in-law lets her daughter to go for work and creates trouble when it comes to daughter in law! She expected her daughter-in-law to take care of her, including the task of heating water for her baths.

Childcare Costs: Affordable, quality childcare options can be scarce, forcing some women to step back from their careers to take care of their little ones themselves. Most private run child care centers charge exhorbitant fees.

Lack of Spousal Support: The inability of husbands to take time off work when children fall ill is a dilemma many women face, with their partners often citing the importance of their own jobs. (oh well, his work is very important !)

Safety Concerns: Reports of child caretaker abuse can create concerns for working mothers, making them reconsider leaving their children in the care of others.

Workplace Flexibility: Some women find that their employers often lack the option for women to work from home when necessary, making it challenging to balance work and family life effectively.

Guilt Complex: The guilt of choosing a career over family responsibilities can be a heavy burden for many women. Society often labels them as ‘selfish’ and comments like, “Oh, look at her… She’s too focused on her career. Doesn’t she care for her child, in-laws, or parents?” It’s common for them to question whether it’s their sole responsibility to care for their children.

Skill and Confidence Hurdles: Getting back to work after a break can be intimidating, especially if your skills feel rusty, and your confidence needs a boost. You might worry that your qualifications are strong, but are our educational institutions equipping us with the right skills?

Low Pay and Family Pressure: Low salaries can lead to mockery from family members,and saying, “You don’t need to work for such a small wage.” This often pushes women to consider leaving their jobs and creating a cycle of career breaks.
Managing a Palatial Household: The demands of maintaining a large household, fear of theft by domestic help, and elaborate cooking styles can further complicate the work-life balance.

Balancing career and motherhood — _{Some of the C2C Fellows of Prayaana who are getting coached on the above challenges and are now getting back to career. Image Courtesy: Dr Chandra Vadhana/Facebook}

While some women choose to embrace motherhood full-time, others find ways to balance their professional and personal lives. Society and employers must work together to create an environment where women are empowered to make the choices that best suit their circumstances, without feeling pressured by outdated norms or unequal expectations.