Girl – honor maker/breaker

Across various cultures, countries, and customs the virtues of a girl or a woman are considered as the standard. The concept of family is said to be the core aspect of the overall society. And within that family system, a girl and her everything decides the honor and status of that respective family in the society.

To some sections-

All the above factors related to a girl are very hectic matters for the entire family. As they believe all of these will somehow determine their family honor and status in the society.

I have heard stories where the mothers have been accused lifetime by their family members and relatives for giving birth to a girl child, which for them is inauspicious to their family, thereby bringing disrepute in the society.

In the age of women empowerment-

If a white collar job girl marries a boy lesser to her and her family’s financial status – she is termed nearly as a mad woman. Why? Because such an act will attract negative comments by the society, on the failure of the potential of that girl’s parents to make her understand the marriage business rules to be followed in order to maintain the family status intact.

Similarly,  If a well settled and good looking girl marries a not so very handsome and less settled boy – she is considered brainless. Because there is a mismatch in the parameters of the pair.

However –

If a girl from a lesser financial status family marries a boy having a white collar job – she is considered luckiest! 

If the most beautiful looking girl marries a charming prince with all the inherited property – she is almost regarded as a boon given by the gods above the sky. Here even a man without proper education but with sufficient inherited property is preferred as the most perfect match, because from ancient times to now.

And –

If a girl marries at age of 28 and above she is considered valueless material, old aged, not suitable for marriage life. Why? because for a girl to get married it is nothing but the potential of her to become a mother is given the highest priority and according to the most popular myth a girl with age above 28 will have a gradually reduced chances of child bearing !

If a boy marries at age of 28 and above he is considered as a man of vision and intelligence. The well structured reason behind this is, for a man with increasing age he will get more financially well and he can also explore his interests in life without getting disturbed by the family life. 

I wonder in the above cases who is really being considered as empowered! The woman is still being considered important majorly for the lone purpose of child bearing, even in this age of the 21st century.

It is a bitter truth that not everybody wants a good educated independent girl but everybody wants a girl to be happily married ever after. Because according to societal expectations the ultimate destination of a girl is to get married at a good age, and it is the ultimate benchmark  of her life.

All these can be changed only by the well educated, strong, independant, liberal, optimistic and broad minded women. Let us be those women and let us create such women.

-Anusha Pappala