“The key to addressing this issue is trust.” – Understanding Sextortion and Its Impact on Our Children
Picture courtesy: Practo
In today’s digital world, where children spend increasing time online, a growing threat has emerged—sextortion. This form of online exploitation can have serious consequences, especially for young minds. To help understand this issue better and offer guidance on how parents can protect their children, Pinky Roy, a student counselor at a renowned international school in Hyderabad, shares her valuable insights with SheSight.
Sextortion refers to a form of online exploitation where perpetrators, often hiding behind fake identities, manipulate victims—usually children or young adults—into sharing personal or intimate information. Once the victim shares something private, the perpetrator uses that information to blackmail them.
“As you will agree,” Pinky says, “in this fast-paced digital world, while technology has made life simpler, it has also introduced serious threats. Sextortion is one of the most dangerous, and sadly, children and young adults are the most vulnerable.”
It usually starts innocently. A stranger may send a friend request, pretending to be a peer or someone from a familiar circle.
“They build trust,” Pinky explains. “They talk about common interests, hobbies, even pretend to be from the same school or community. Eventually, they start requesting photos or personal details. When children share these, the blackmail begins—asking for money, more pictures, or even tasks.”
What makes this so dangerous is how naturally it unfolds. “Initially, the child believes it’s just a friendship. By the time they realize something’s wrong, they’re already trapped,” she adds.
The manipulators are clever. They rely heavily on digital footprints—information people leave online through social media, apps, and websites. “Today, we register on multiple sites, give out phone numbers and email addresses. Children do this too. It’s easy for these criminals to collect that data and target them,” Pinky warns.
Often, the offender convinces the child to turn on video chat or send a photo by saying, “Everyone does it,” or pretending to share their own picture first (which is usually fake).
Pinky emphasizes the importance of observation. “If your child is suddenly secretive, hides their phone or computer screen, avoids social activities, or isolates themselves during family events—these are red flags.”
Other signs include:
- Staying locked in their room more often
- Avoiding previously enjoyed hobbies
- Loss of appetite or noticeable weight loss
- Anxiety, guilt, or mood swings
“Of course, not all these signs mean sextortion,” she says. “But as caregivers, we must not overlook small changes in behavior.”
What Parents Can Do – According to Pinky, open communication and trust are key
“Trust is the magic word,” she states firmly. “If a child feels safe sharing anything with their parents, the damage can be minimized or avoided. Talk to them regularly. Ask how their day was, who they spoke to online. Not in an interrogating way, but as a friend.”
She cautions against “helicopter parenting,” which can push children away. Instead, she recommends “being present,” knowing who their friends are—both offline and online—without constantly monitoring their every move.
“Just being there when they need you and making sure they know that,” she says, “is powerful.”
Pinky believes that digital literacy is essential—not just for children, but for parents too.
“We, as parents, also need to understand the online world. Many of us unknowingly share personal photos and details on Facebook or Instagram. This makes us and our children more vulnerable.”
She stresses the importance of setting boundaries and discussing the risks of sharing information online.
“Children must be taught early about privacy, and that once something is online, it’s hard to take back.”
Resources and Help
If a parent suspects sextortion, it’s vital not to panic or blame the child. Instead, offer support and seek professional help. There are counselors, school resources, and online safety organizations that can guide families.
“There’s help available,” Pinky says. “But the first step is creating a safe space at home where children feel they can talk.”
As our conversation came to a close, Pinky left us with a powerful thought:
“Life has become simpler thanks to technology, but also more complicated. We no longer have the village that helped raise children. Now, the responsibility largely lies with the parents. Don’t ignore the small things. What seems insignificant may be the key to preventing something bigger.”
In one line, her advice to parents is: “Trust your children, respect them, and help them understand boundaries.”
Let’s all commit to creating a safer digital world—one where children can grow, explore, and connect, without fear.
We extend our heartfelt thanks to Pinky Roy for sharing her valuable insights, compassion, and expertise on such a critical issue. Her practical advice and thoughtful reflections remind us that awareness, trust, and open communication are the most powerful tools we have as parents and caregivers.
To all the readers, thank you for taking the time to engage with this important conversation. Let’s continue to educate ourselves, support one another, and work together to create a safer, kinder digital world for our children.
Suparna Rao, Staff Reporter
